I remember the night of my epiphany, feeling much like Columbus when he discovered Ohio. I'm Chlamydia Burns, a southern gal from Chatanooga working as an Olive Garden server, befitting my Vanderbilt education. But enough about me. I'm thirty-six, single, auburn hair, hippy, (sounds so much better than big-assed) buxom (which doesn't sound better than 'big tits'). I was tossing and turning
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